It's 2:06 am, 25th December, aka Christmas.
Friends are having fun, parents are sleeping.
I'm doing neither.
Evenings such as these really brings with it this wretched feeling of sordidness.
Earlier when I was a kid, during winter I would get these sudden urges to create artwork and crafts and things alike, and after making something I would be thoroughly disappointed with myself and end up throwing the entire thing into the dustbin, only after ripping it to pieces.
No, this had nothing to do with my short-temper, rage or impatience and not that I wasn't good at art- I was rather good at it. It was just this inadequate feeling that hovered in the air and sucked the fun out of everything.
Contrarily, winter is also when I'm quite happy and active most of the time. In summer I'm cranky and lazy. Yes.
So it's weird how I can have such contradictory feelings. I guess that's why I really like and identify with the phrase "in two minds" whether it means you're indecisive or you're having mixed feelings, it kind of goes with what's going on in my head most of the time, although I don't like to think of myself as a fickle person. I'm not I guess, or am I? And this doesn't mean that I am.
My mother is very fickle-minded ( when i was a kid, I used to say 'frickle-minded' instead of 'fickle-minded', but that's not important right now). My mother is the queen of fickle-minded people. I say this often but she's like the Roman mob, except she's one person.
and now I dont want to type anymore.
This sucks.
Below, are some Christmas photos.
Enjoy.
