CRAZY

i went to the see the doctor the other day, and he told me i'm crazy.
i have nothing to say.
i always knew.
so did most of my friends.
thats because they're crazy as well, just not officially certified like me.

i have a friend who talks to imaginary people on the phone.Whenever see she's a nice cellphone, she gets excited, and puts it to her ear and starts a conversation so amazingly normal that i sit and gape at her for a long span of time.She can go on for hours without stopping or feeling that "ok thats enough"...i mean, i do...anyway.

i have another friend who thinks that she's a nice girl. She often proclaims this publicly, actually she does it all the time so we're pretty much used to it but i assure you the way she says it is certainly not normal. She also has some kind of wierd unearthly relation with her personal computer "pc" and she often tells me how annoying her pc can be sometimes.oh and recently whenever she goes to a high place she feels like jumping.ahem...

another friend of mine is verymuch what you would call our average teenage psycho maniac. she's also a killer. an animal killer at that!
till date she has killed:
-a pole cat(large)
-one baby kitten(you dont wanna hear the procedure!
-nearly her dog "meimei" ( several times)
-one pigeon
-one crow
-three baby sparrows
-13 goldfish(the last one had a most tragic death, but she said it must have been happy in its last hour of life as it was listening to Pink Floyd..but what if it had a bad taste of music and maybe it would have preferd "kata laga"!?)
-many many ants, flies and butterflies.(i think)...now dat is crazy enough for everybody!

ok another woman i know, she is eccentric. the little thing is always excited, jumping around and dont be fooled by her cute and adorable appearence cause she can be one pesky cat. it has been recorded (and i mean recorded) that all of a sudden amidst a peaceful environment she has some kind of fit in which she jumps and maked her head go round and round and you have to stay as far away as possible or you might get injured as i once did when she ran into me and made a bump on my nose from which i still have not recovered completely (the accident took place on the 24th of april 2006). so there goes another one.

ok this one i'm talking about is crazy in the sense that she does wat she is told to. as in if you tell her to do her "funny laugh" or her "funny dance" ..she'll instantly do it and i assure they...they are FUNNY!!!!
I mean they are so hilarious. they're...they're...um...theres no other word for them..CRAZY! next.

ok the person who i am talking about is the type of person who can sit for hours without talking to anybody. she is generally very quiet and does not speak much but she labels her furniture...that is she writes "toothpaste" on her toothpaste etc... with a marker. she also writes wierd things all over the walls of her room and her mirror and she sometimes lies flat and on her back playing dead and then throwing up.

ok one more. i have to write about this guy. he looks up at the sky everyday and sees god. and sometimes he sees god looking at him and sometimes he doesnt.
the stars are supposed to be god's eyes and when there are no stars then god is blind.and he also thinks that the hair on his right foot is more dense than the hair in his left foot.gross?...yes i know...

another friend i have goes gallavanting around the city in a car full of friends and eggs people on the road and he keeps a baseball bat in his car which he utilises in chasing baby thieves that come to his house to steal things and he also does a number of other things which i cannot tell anyone...

so you see i cant help being crazy because all my friends are crazy too.
or maybe they are my friends because they are crazy...
being crazy isnt bad.
all great people are/were crazy.
amen.

In Two Minds

sing me a love song
and i'll give you a reason
grant me an exucse

i'll give you religion

save me a candle

i'll offer you light

show me how to surrender

i'll teach you how to fight

give me a hand

i say i've got your back

colour me white

and i'll paint you black

write me a poem

i'll sing you a lullaby

if you teach me how to walk

i'll teach you how to flyi

i'll show you how to take

you teach me how to give

if i teach you how to die

will you show me how to live?

on the edge...

Random Photographs

sunset on by-pass

i nearly missed it.

the car was moving too fast.

eLink

This is my fool around photography elink:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/thepsychorocker


um..

i think thats about it.

Hello Me.

the red light flickered on and off ...on and off...on and off...
every night it would do the same.
and i would watch it from my balcony
where i would hide and smoke the cigarette i stole from uncle Douglas.
Uncle Douglas has a friend called Styne.
He likes to dress up like a girl sometimes and when he does he calls himself Madame Vulgara Mascara.
They also have a dog...called "Cow"....they dyed the dog, blue,red and yellow one day.The dog is still blue, red and yellow.
i tried to save it but ultimately i failed.
Poor dog.
Uncle Douglas is out tonight with Styne (not Madame Vulgara Mascara)
i do not know when they will be back.
I never know when they're back.
thats why i'm hiding in the balcony behind the spare tires..smoking
the red light is still flickering on and off...on and off...on and off...

there's a cat in the alley below.
she's a house cat.
and she's called ginger(quite normal).
"Cow" is jealous of her.

***

The phone is ringing.
but i wont pick it up.
because i'm supposed to be asleep by now.
uncle douglas does that alot.
calls to check whether i'm alseep or not.
the first time he did this i picked up the phone as i was watching late night televsion.
he screamed at me.
i had hung up.
i never fell for it again.

alvin usually spends the night with me when i'm alone.
we smoke a joint together, listen to psychedelic music and get high.
but he's not here tonight.
thats 'cause he's dead.
he died last month in a bus accident.
he was going for a family vaccation to san antonia and the bus fell into a ditch or something.
they say he was too weak to survive so many injuries.
yeah...alvin was unusually thin.
i always told him to eat more.
never listened to me. that bastard.
and now look what he's done.
gone and killed himself.
some people are just stupid.

a lot of people die around me.
i've noticed.
my mah died when i was a child.
i just remember that she had beautiful soft hair that i used to play with.
then my dad died cause he used to drink too much.
then uncle douglas took me in.
after that grandma died (she was kinda old)
and then alvin.

i think uncle douglas is back.
i can hear Styne's boots jingling.
i better go to bed now.
the flickering red light is still going on and off....on and off....on and off.


[the characters :uncle douglas, styne and "cow" the dog and "ginger" the cat are all real live characters..]

PRIZE

WE CAME SECOND IN THE BHS FEST!!!!
YAY!!!!
MUHAHAHAHA!!


[sudden outburst of emotions...hehe.]

A Blusear Mi Vida

I pushed open the curiously dusty doors of the pub and walked in. I chose a corner seat, one that had a table with it and a soft padded armchair.There were few poeple there, most of them too drunk to even stand up straight but they were all quiet. The waiter , a young boy in black came up and didnt ask me whether i wanted "the usual" or not. In fact he never asked me anything. I ordered a scotch, he went to the bar ,fixed it and handed it to me in a small crystal glass. The air was smoky . I lit a cigarette. There was a band playing softly in a corner of the dance floor.
It was some unknown blues - jazz band. The guy in front played the saxophone accompanied by a guitarist and the piano. The drums were being played with a brush to produce the muted and choked effect of percussion.
It was beautiful music. There was noone there in that room who was known to me yet i felt a sense of comfort that i never felt at home. I always dreamt of being chased by someone and that chase would always lead me away from my house...not that i would have stayed there anyway. So i sat in the pub whose name i had not seen when i came in just beacause. I sat there and i thought about the days and nights i had spent trying to achieve something that ultimately has no value or maybe it does and i am just stupid. Everyone will be forgotten one day even if you dont want to be forgotten. So why bother trying to make yourself known by communicating. So i sat silently although i wasnt drunk and i thought about nothing because i wanted to store this sensation of undefinable comfort for sometime. I closed my eyes and tried to hum a familiar song the band was playing, maybe it was "hey joe" or it could have been "stand by me"....but i wasnt sure so i left the place. i hate it when that happens,when i am not sure of myself. Thats why i dont believe in fate as i'm not comfortable with the fact that i'm not in control of my actions in future...
I went back home and fell asleep and dreamt of being chased away from my house .

SHE THE PHOTOGRAPHER.

she calls herself a photographer.
i know why she does.
it is not because she has a fancy camera that allows her pictures to turn out to be effortlessly beautiful,
but not that she puts in a lot of effort.
it is not because she puts effects on her photos so that others might approve of her talent.

she is a photographer because she sees things which others see as well but cannot comprehend.
she has the vision that she captures in frame.
she calls herself a photographer,
not because she takes pictures of others to make them look beautiful.
but because she captures the character of a person in her frame.
when her eyes look upon something, anything and as she blinks the picture is stored in her memory for ever, maybe lost along with several memories of vibrant sunsets and forgotten friends and other things.

she calls herself a photographer because she considers her photographs to be fragments of her vision she wishes to share with the world or to store in a carboard box in the corner of her attic behind a pirates chest.

she is a photographer they say. and i agree.

scrabble

i could turn to look at my past
but i wouldnt on my own
i wouldnt ask you to do it for me
not because i dont want you to see whats there
but just because i want to tell someone to not do something for a change.
right now i feel like my feet are wet and stationary and my body is moving ahead into the void of yellow-white.
then i see my wet footsteps walking away from me....leaving me in the void of yellow-white.
i am floating in this.
there are long shadows behind me that touch me.
there is a black eagle with an orange beak somwhere on a rooftop,they tell me.
they've seen it and are afraid of it, they tell me.
they said "nobodysaid it was easy"
and i just listened.